Proceed with caution: Sense of Humor required!
Al's Wedding-related jokes and one-liners.
Go back to Joke index
Proceed with caution: Sense of Humor required!Al's Wedding-related jokes and one-liners.
Go back to Joke index |
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Congratulations on the termination of your isolation and may I express an appreciation of your determination to end the desperation and frustration which has caused you so much consternation in giving you the inspiration to make a combination to bring an accumulation to the population.
--
To my husband,
We have been through the better and worse
(not always the better prevailed)
We've seen the richer and poorer
(the latter is most often sailed)
The sickness has outrun the health
(which often has caused much ado)
So now I pledge to you my heart,
till death do us part,
And pray all our dreams will come true!
--
Here's to love, laughter
and happily ever after.
As (Groom) and (Bride) start their new life,
Let's toast the new husband and wife! -- ullrichpr@airmail.net
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Me got him.
He got me.
We got us.
You got that? -- s_fyfe@hotmail.com
--
To our best friends,
who know the most about us,
but refuse to believe it.
--
A TOAST: To our wives and lovers . . . may they never meet!
--
Here's to me
And here's to you
And here's to love and laughter.
I'll be true as long as you...
But not a minute after -nicmc1028@aol.com
--
An old German toast:
"Wasser macht weise
Froelich der Wein
Darum trinke beides
Um beides zu sein!"
Water make you wise
Wine makes you glad
So drink them both
In order both to be! -- contributed by LGalvan@davd.com
--
A toast!
To the two secrets to a long-lasting happy marriage:
Here's to good sense of humor
--and a short memory!
--
May we never forget
what is worth remembering
or remember
what is best forgotten.
--
An old toast that my Mother used to offer at family gatherings
"Here's to It,
And to It again.
When you get to It,
and can't do It;
Come see me,
because I'm used to It!" -- tperkes@georgian.net
--
This toast was made by a friend at my own wedding almost 11 years ago.
Here's to that moment of sweet repose
When it's cheek to cheek and nose to nose
For after that moment of sublime delight
It's fanny to fanny for the rest of the night. -- cgbdad@earthlink.net
--
"Here's to the bride that is to be, Here's to the groom she'll wed, May all their troubles be light as bubbles Or the feathers that make up their bed! "
--
"Here's to the bride. May your hours of joy be as numerous as the petals of your bridal bouquet."
--
"To the man who has conquered the bride's heart, and her mother's."
--
"Here's to the groom, a man who keeps his head though he loses his heart."
--
"Down the hatch, to a striking match!"
--
"Marriage: A community consisting of a master, a mistress,
and two slaves ­ making in all, two."-- Ambrose Bierce
--
"May you grow old on one pillow." -- Armenian toast
--
"Here's to the bride and the bridegroom,
We'll ask their success in our prayers,
And through life's dark shadows and sunshine
That good luck may always be theirs." -- Armenian toast
--
The vows have been read,
The cake has been cut;
Let's hope that (bride's name),
Don't grow a big butt!
--
Here's to Eve, Mother of our race,
Who wore a fig leaf in the right place.
And to Adam, Father of us all,
Who was Johnny-on-the-spot when the leaves began to fall!
--
"To the newlyweds: May "'for better or worse' be far better than worse."
--
"May your joys be as deep as the ocean,
and your troubles as light as its foam." CakesnAle@aol.com
--
To Fred & Wilma - may the best of their past be the worst of their future --Howden@dial.pipex
--
"Here's to marriage, that happy estate that resembles a pair of scissors: 'So joined that they cannot be separated, often moving in opposite directions, yet punishing anyone who comes between them.'"-- Sydney Smith -
--
"May your wedding days be few and your anniversaries many."
--
"Here's to you and here's to me,
I hope we never disagree,
But if, perchance. we ever do,
Then here's to me, to hell with you."
--
"I drink to the general joy of the whole table." -- Shakespeare, from Macbeth
--
" May your love be modern enough to survive the times and old-fashioned enough to last forever. "
--
To keep a marriage brimming
with love in the loving cup-
When you are wrong, admit it
and when you are right, shut up!
--
"May thy life be long and happy,
Thy cares and sorrows few;
And the many friends around thee
Prove faithful, fond and true."
--
To quote John Keats's immortal line, "A thing of beauty is a joy forever.
Here's to you, my beautiful bride."
--
" To my wife, My bride and joy. "
--
To quote Walter Winchell:
"Never above you. Never below you. Always beside you."
--
" Here's to the woman that's good and sweet,
Here's to the woman that's true,
Here's to the woman that rules my heart,
In other words, here's to you."
--
Were't the last drop in the well,
An I gasp'd upon the brink,
Ere my fainting spirit fell,
'Tis to thee that I would drink. -- Lord Byron
--
"Every day you look lovelier and lovelier, and today you look like tomorrow."
--
"To my bride: she knows all about me and loves me just the same."
--
"Let's drink to love, which is nothing - unless it's divided by two."
--
"Here's to the prettiest, here's to the wittiest,
Here's to the truest of all who are true,
Here's to the neatest one, here's to the sweetest one,
Here's to them, all in one - here's to you."
--
Here's to The Bride, her kisses so sweet
she makes things stand that have no feet
she lost her cherry, but that's no sin
for she saved the box that it came in.
--
"Because I love you truly,
Because you love me, too,
My very greatest happiness
Is sharing life with you."
--
" I have known many,
Liked not a few,
Loved only one
I toast to you" --Irish toast
--
"May these rich blessings be your due...
A wealth of friendships, old and new,
quiet nights and busy days, time for prayer and time for praise,
some service rendered, some solace given,
and gentle peace with God and heaven. " --Anonymous Irish blessing
--
"Drink to me only with thine eyes,
And I will pledge with mine;
Or leave a kiss within the cup,
And I'll not look for wine. --Ben Jonson
--
"The man or woman you really love will never grow old to you.
Through the wrinkles of time, through the bowed frame of years,
you will always see the dear face and feel
the warm heart union of your eternal love." -- Alfred A. Montapert
--
May our children be blessed with rich parents!
--
"It is written: when children find true love, parents find true joy.
Here's to your joy and ours,from this day forward."
--
"Happy marriages begin when we marry the one we love,
and they blossom when we love the one we married." - Sam Levenson -
--
Let us raise our glasses
And then imbibe
To the splendid couple
Who founded this tribe.
--
ALsMUSIC is located in Ames, Iowa. Owner, Al Weltha, supplies
superior disc jockey entertainment for wedding receptions and
other events state-wide. More about list
editor, Al Weltha. |
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